So Nate was a douche bag. But the whole situation taught me a few things. First off, I was going to try to be a better dater myself. I was determined to be upfront with a guy no matter what. If I wasn't interested? No problem, I'd just politely let him know. And if I was interested? Well, I'd let him know that, too. I decided no more games, no more bullshit. I was done playing and being played.

Which is how I got roped into having a drink with Kevin after work about a week or so after I sent Nate that lovely email.

Kevin was one of 3 guys that I had been actively chatting with on match when things got going with Nate. And since I was convinced I'd soon be off the dating market, I never bothered to get back to any of those other guys.

Now, I know. You're like, so? It'd been weeks, they probably moved on, why drag more skeletons outta the closet? Perfectly good question. And had I not sworn to turn over a new dating leaf, I probably would've just let sleeping dogs lie, but I felt bad. I felt bad because I had in no certain terms, basically agreed to meet up with these guys at some point, and didn't feel right just falling off the face of the earth like that. Because that sucks.

I expected to simply write them back, explain to them that I was going off the market for awhile, taking a break and that I wasn't really interested in dating anyone at the moment. Which was absolutely the truth. What was truthier, was that I wasn't really interested in dating them in particular and hadn't had the balls to tell them that and had been sort of stringing them along.

Which also sucks.

And so this brings me now to Kevin.

Kevin missed the mark in almost every way in terms of what I was looking for in a person. The only reason I had continued talking with him as long as I did was that we got involved in a somewhat deep political discussion via email and I rather enjoyed making fun of him his point of view.

He and I were on polar opposite sides of the spectrum politically. He was a tried and true Bush supporter, I loved Gore and was still rooting for Kerry. He wanted a family. HUGE family. I didn't want kids, period. And aside from the glaring personality issues that we faced, physically, he was short. Like, really short. Like 4 inches shorter than me, and given my love at the time of 3 inch heels, that was a deal breaker right there.

So even though there was no chance in hell I would ever be interested in him, I gave him a chance anyway and it was time to finally cut the chord, once and for all, as gingerly as I possibly could.

Since we had not exchanged phone numbers (I had finally learned that lesson), my only way to reach him was through email on match. Feeling good about my decision, that I was really doing the right thing (it was like I was washing my karma clean), I sent him a polite, yet firm email.

To which he almost immediately responded to with an "are you kidding?" Seeing he was online, I opened a chat window (I know... stupid...) because I didn't want there to be hard feelings.

Me: Hey, I'm sorry, I'm just not interested in dating anyone right now. I only wrote to tell you because I didn't want to be one of those people who totally leave someone hanging like that.

Kevin: I think you're making a huge mistake.

Me: Why is that?

Kevin: Because you and I had great chemistry. Don't throw the baby out with the bath water just because you got jilted by some guy. I'm not like other guys.

Me: That's probably true, but I'm not interested.

Kevin: Give me one good reason you won't go out with me.

Me: I'll give you 3. 1) you're a republican. 2) you want kids and 3) I am NOT INTERESTED.

Kevin: I find that hard to believe that you would take the time to write me, just to say you're not interested. Have a drink with me. Tomorrow night at the Oak Room.

Me: what part of no do you not understand?

Kevin: I understand no when I believe there's a valid reason. I'm not taking no for an answer until we at least meet for a drink.

Me: Fine. 1 drink.

And that's how, despite being done with dating, I was going out on yet another date, with a guy I didn't want to date, who I tried to let down easy, but some how got wrangled into going out with anyway.

I clearly was not so good at this part yet.